WELL it seemed a good idea at the time. We’re not talking Christmas party goofs or voting for Brexit. Just those seasonal ‘specials’ that in the cold light of January will seem as silly as still sporting those twinkly antlers.
1 Turkeys voting for burgers this Christmas
We love the Black Dog Ballroom dearly, but whatever possessed them to promote the Turkey Burger, available every day up to Christmas at both city centre venues for £11.It’s topped with cheese, cranberry sauce, bacon and pigs in blankets made with Old English sausages and smoked bacon – plus a stuffing ball – and served with chips topped with cheese and bacon, crispy roast potatoes cooked in duck fat and garnished with rosemary, roasted carrots and parsnips and more pigs in blankets.
A turkey-based rival is Solita’s Christmas Burger, which stacks a brioche bun with a sage and onion patty, buttermilk fried turkey, a gammon slice, port and cranberry sauce, deep fried sprouts, turkey gravy, a candied pig in a blanket and aged Cheddar (part of thr Christmas menu, 50p from each burger going to to Age UK's 'Call In Time' service).
But the artery-hardening winner has to be Almost Famous’ Xmas Blowout – a double cheeseburger stacked with maple cinnamon glazed bacon, buttermilk fried turkey, cola smoked BBQ sauce, crispy waffle fries, slaw and bacon cranberry jam. Tottering on top pork, brie and cranberry slider and a pig in a blanket .ToM might make a Boxing Day curry with the leftovers.
2 Crimbo Cake Pizza with pig’s blankets from Crazy Pedro’s
We love Crazy Pedro’s even more dearly but whatever possessed them to launch this week, topping even their most over the top pizza one-offs, LET IT DOUGH, LET IT DOUGH, LET IT DOUGH, which features Christmas cake, Cheddar cheese, fig, pear, pigs in blankets, parsley, cranberry and balsamic glaze. It costs the standard £15 for a 16incher to share (or £3 a slice.
3 Miraculous! Who can say no to a spot of Ho-Ho-Ho?
No pig’s blankets that we know of at Miracle on Edge Street but puns aplenty to accompany the obligatory ironic Christmas jumpers at this Northern Quarter festive pop-up. The pun we like best is Prosec-Ho Ho Ho, where the bizarrely popular poor, poor man’s Champagne is made palatable with a slug of home-made mulled wine syrup.
4 Look after your Elf and tackle the spaghetti guzzling showdown
Taking the festive season altogether more seriously are the Albert Hall folk with their Elf Manchester House Party on Saturday, December 17 (tickets £12 for the balcony still available) based around a singalong screening of the Will Ferrel film, Elf. Toast your good elf at their Christmas beer festival and cocktail bar and feed your inner elf with mince pies before hitting the stage for a (very Christmassy) Spaghetti Eating Competition. Now that sounds like a dry cleaning bill for your jolly green elf costume.
5 Yule log takes on a whole new meaning at FEAST in the ‘forest’
ToM ran into favourite chef Robert Owen Brown grabbing a coffee away from the white heat of his FEAST pop-up kitchen in the former 47 King Street West site snapped up by San Carlo. He was a mite puzzled by the publicity generated by his serving a Sunday roast of mixed meats including a whole poussin, Yorkshire puddings, veg and a jug of gravy on a ‘TREE TRUNK!’ A quiet news day again then? FEAST is after all, woodland-themed. For two to share at £28.50 it looks a delicious bargain from a chef at the top of his game. A must-eat-at before the place shuts up shop in January.
Certainly it pips by a mile festive treats such as the sawdust dry turkey with wasabi sprouts one pan-Asian eaterie served us last Christmas. To avoid that festive fate again we’d even go and listen to the Sinatra-singing Santa at The Printworks on Saturday, December 17 in our snowflake tank-tops and pom pom deely boppers. You have been warned.